A letter to all of my atheist, non-theist, antitheist, irreligious, or otherwise generally-not-a-fan-of-Christianity friends

Hey.

I hope that - whatever the nature of our relationship is or has been, however we met, how long we've known each other, whatever - I really hope that I have stored up enough cred with you that I can be frank about a couple things that have been eating away at my brain for the past few months. I want to just lay out a few points all in one go, because I've found - over and over and over again - that a lot of things get in the way of conversations I think we'd all rather have.

First off... The rumors are true, I am actually a Christian, I believe in God, I believe Jesus was God in the flesh, I believe He died and was resurrected, and I firmly, completely, sincerely believe that He knew what He was talking about.

And I know you're not there. That's cool, I promise I completely love you anyway.

I just feel like there's quite often a wall of communication barriers in our conversation because there are some ideas floating around out there that have distorted what this whole Christ-following thing is really supposed to be about. And goodness knows I can't speak for every Christian on the planet. (They certainly don't like me speaking TO them! BUH-DUM-PSSH) But I know that there are things that I believe that have routinely seemed to surprise you guys, so... let me just get it all out in the open, OK? Then let's see where we can go.

First off... And man, this is a big one... You can't judge a system by its abuses. Or by its abusers, for that matter.

I realize - more than you might think - that there are some really awful people in the world who have done some really awful things to other people in the world and have waved a cross around while doing it.

Those things were still awful.

The Crusades were bad. Protestant vs. Catholic violence is bad. The Spanish Inquisition was bad. Abortion clinic bombings are bad. Clerical child abuse and church cover-ups are bad. Pick a thing that anybody has ever done in the name of Christianity that trampled all over the rights of others, forced people to submit to someone else's idea of morality or propriety, or ever said that someone else wasn't good enough... That was bad.

And that's not even sorta kinda a little bit maybe close to anything like what Christianity is supposed to be.

Let's consider communism for a minute.

On a global scale, we can see pretty quickly and easily that communism comes with its fair share of problems. Corruption is inextricably linked to state communism. People are miserable. The Berlin Wall wasn't put up as scenery. People don't try to ride an inner tube from Cuba to Florida just to get to EPCOT. China doesn't censor the internet because it's worried about the citizenry looking at porn. IT AIN'T GOOD.

But on a smaller, voluntary, personally connected scale? Communism is AMAZING. Voluntary communism is a goal of mine. Straight up. I want to get a bunch of people together who have alike minds in their desire to live sustainably and reasonably, sharing food and homes and lives in an enriching environment of love and peace. But everybody else has to be on board with that idea for it to work, right? Everybody has to understand what the common goal is and how to reach it.

If I intentionally try to base my future hippie utopia on Stalin's USSR, I'm obviously gonna miss it. And similarly, if I only thought of communism as people carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, and couldn't see past the abuses to see the actual functionality of the true system, then I'd never have realized that goal that I want to work toward.

So is communism bad? Or is it just the abuse of communism that's bad? Can you accurately judge communism only by looking at the terrible things that people who happened to be communist were doing? Or do you look at the idea itself and see the good it strives to be?

Jesus is pretty open and plain about what He's trying to teach people, and Love is really the whole kit and caboodle. The rest of the New Testament dudes who weren't Jesus back that up. Love is what matters. I realize that there are gray areas and questions about exactly what Love IS, but I think we should all be able to see without any trouble what Love ISN'T.

Beating people up - verbally or physically - for being different isn't Love. So whenever somebody doing that claims to be doing it in the name of God, just remember they're full of crap. If they were paying attention to what God has actually made it really obvious He wants us to do, they wouldn't be out picketing funerals.

Which brings me to those guys.

We're not all those guys. Far more of us aren't those guys than are. Please stop associating us with those guys, because we aren't them, don't want to be them, and sure don't want to be mistaken for them.

Some systems - like, say, Nazism - are corrupt all the way through, and when you look at the ideas that the system presents as truth, you can see that they're probably things you don't want to be involved in, like your various supremacy and hate groups, or Beliebers.

But other systems - like, say, enjoying ice cream - have some pretty good things going for them. It's just that, yes, unfortunately, there are complete jerkwhistles out there who also enjoy ice cream and might do things that ruin it for the rest of us. Like Dippin' Dots. But the existence of Dippin' Dots doesn't mean that all ice cream is bad! It just means that even good ideas can be corrupted into horrible, soulless, foul little frozen balls of Styrofoam and artificial flavoring.

What I'm saying here is that Christianity is one of those ice cream systems. How can you really hate on a philosophy that is COMPLETELY tied into, based on, and practiced through unconditional, self-sacrificing, genuine LOVE for everyone?

Bad Christians don't make Christianity bad.

And you know what else? We're not all "young earth" people. Some of us can actually accept God and scientific evidence at the same time. I know there are yahoos all around fighting to make sure science textbooks talk about Creationism, and believe it or not, I don't think that's necessary, or helpful, or intelligent. I think it's a sign of some really dangerous - and even worse lazy - theology.

(I'd like to take a moment to get meta with you for a sec and talk about this blog post that you, my atheist/nontheist/antitheist/whatever friend, are reading, because I promise you, plenty of my Christian friends are reading this one too, and I'm about to say some stuff that a lot of them do not like to hear. But hey, there's plenty of folk out there who already think I'm going to hell just for liking the Indigo Girls, so it's not like I'm gonna make things any worse.)

We can talk about where the idea of the "young earth" comes from, but I assure you, it doesn't matter. Like, man, not at all. Not a bit. Not for a second. It's pointless. I personally believe that there is no decent scriptural defense for insisting that Creationism be taught in schools, or even that Christian kids shouldn't know that the earth sure looks like it's about 4.5 billion years old.

So dudes, please hear me out when I say that my belief in God does not prevent me from believing in dinosaurs or the Big Bang or the awesome of Carl Sagan.

But it really doesn't matter... either way.

You know why?

Because science does not - can not - answer the questions that faith asks.

They're not the same thing. They're not even close.

Science observes what can be observed.

Faith is concerned with things that cannot be observed.

God can't be scienced away. There's no good reason for anyone to try to use God to get rid of science. The two don't cancel each other out any more than drinking eggnog prevents you from being named Jeff.

Look, even Richard Dawkins admits that he can't be SURE God doesn't exist. It's not a provable or disprovable thing. Science can uncover the mysteries of every subatomic particle of matter, and it can translate the base code of the pulsars and quasars at the farthest distances of the universe. Science can, does, and should tell us everything we could possibly ever dream of knowing about the depth and beauty and power of the natural world.

But science can't say a thing about the supernatural.

That's not its job. That's not what it does. That's not how it works.

Whether or not the supernatural exists, that's an entirely different conversation that I'm totally willing to have. But the next one of you guys that tries to tell me you don't believe in God because of the Large Hadron Collider, I'm throwing a beer at your face, as well as whatever bottle, glass, or can it is in. So knock it off.

So now that we've cleared away some of what seem to be very pervasive obstacles I'd like to throw out just one little confession to go with it.

Yeah, I totally am trying to get you in on this thing. Call it trying to convert you, call it proselytizing, call it whatever you feel like calling it, I'm at least owning up to definitely wanting you to see the same things I see and experience them for yourself and then make a decision about what you believe. I want that to happen. I genuinely believe that earnestly trying to follow the teachings of Jesus is inevitably rewarded (in this life, by the way) with inexpressibly, incalculably positive benefits. I think it is good, and I want to share. Same thing I do with my movies and my music and my comics and my beer.

But if I start shoving it down your throat, I give you full permission to set me right by whatever means you feel necessary, because yeah, that ain't cool. Jesus didn't think too highly of it. Kinda ticked Him off right royal. So whenever I do screw it up... Don't blame Jesus, 'cause that's all me.

Some things I wish I wasn't thinking

One of the greatest tragedies of having survived a life of sin (whatever the circumstances of that sin might have been) is that it seems like nobody listens.

And I know - thick as I am - that just because I've got some skeletons in my closet, that doesn't mean that I've got anybody else's struggles figured out.

But it does not take a man of great years or frightful experience to figure out that some things are just plain bad news.

You know who Bob Ross was, right? The painter? Used to have a show, The Joy of Painting, on PBS for a long time. Had the fro thing going.

Bob had a saying in his show... "There are no mistakes, only happy accidents." Lots of those happy accidents would turn into happy little trees or a happy little stream running down the side of the happy little mountain.

I wish Bob's philosophy applied to actual life.

I wish I could look back on all the things that I have majorly screwed up in my life and - through the consequences of some of those actions - in the lives of others and say they were just happy accidents.

But I'm not awake at 3:40 AM thinking about all the times I screwed up that turned out happy in the end.

There are some mistakes that I have made that have definitely impacted the man I am today, and in a way that I can only attribute to the grace of God, I can see where some good has come from those mistakes, because I've learned lessons along the way that have helped me avoid such mistakes again.

All the same, really wish I hadn't ever made those mistakes in the first place.

More than that, I wish I could tell some people some things. More accurately, I wish I could get them to listen.

I don't have it all figured out. I know that. Doesn't take divine inspiration to get that much nailed down.

But Lord God in Heaven do I pray that there was some way to show people the fire they are playing with.

So many people are convinced, beyond any shadow of doubt or any room for discussion, that they will be the ones to carry the rattlesnake down the mountain and not get bit.

The rattlesnake is no respecter of persons, my beloved.

I have scars that are opened up fresh every time I see my sins reflected in the lives of others. There are things that I wish I could take back, but even more than ever undoing them myself, I want to avoid seeing those mistakes made again by those I care about.

This is emotion, pure and unfiltered. I don't even know if I'm making sense, I just have to get it out.

I love you, no matter who you are or what you're doing. But if you're doing something stupid - and I really think that in the back of your head, way down in the guts and gizzards of who we all are, we know if we're doing something stupid - just know that I would love to see you not do that anymore. I ain't gonna love you any less if you don't.

It's just gonna hurt.

(Also, because I can't resist an even mildly appropriate song drop... The Faces - Ooh La La)

An open letter to my GLBTQ friends

Hey.

Umm... I'm sorry.

I think that's probably the best place to start.

I'm not trying to apologize on behalf of all Christians ever or anything like that, I'm just saying sorry from me.

I haven't always been the not-that-bad guy that I am, and in my younger, dumber days, I said some things that were probably very hurtful. And I kinda said those things a lot. Loudly. (That's really the only way I know how to say anything, sorry.)

Some of you reading this might not have heard me say anything hurtful, and that's awesome. Thank God. Hope I can keep it that way.

But as the years go by and Facebook continues to update me on the lives of people I haven't seen in at least a decade, I have found out that I have way more GLBTQ friends from way, way, way back in the day than I thought I did... and man, I was a dumb kid.

Also young adult. I was a dumb one of those as well.

I think it's a good thing that there wasn't ever any kind tie to my faith with whatever hurtful things I was saying... I was just a dumb jerk. I didn't tell gay jokes because I thought gay people were going to hell, I told gay jokes because I also still told jokes about midgets in Las Vegas brothels.

Dirty jokes were still funny. Gay jokes counted.

So I grew out of that. Thank God.

I do want to let you know that not all Christians are Westboro Baptist members. Some of us are trying to take Jesus very seriously on that whole "Love others" stuff He was always going on about.

Also, to any of my GLBTQ friends who are following after Christ with me... Hang in there. I love you. I feel a little weird around some groups of Christians because our interpretations of Genesis 1-11 differ. I cannot even begin to imagine what your experience must be. I hope we can one day share a communion of Love and Truth and rejoice in each other's company as children of God. I hope that in the meantime you're in a place where God's showing you things and surrounding you with His people.

There are other things that I want to say, but it really feels like I'm being told to shut up, so... I will.

Words

I don't know what to say anymore.

I feel like writing is the only thing* I'm very good at, and I also feel like I've completely forgotten how to do it.

I used to update this once a week, never missed a beat.

I used to write a humor column at least once every two weeks for my college newspaper.

I also used to pray daily.

I don't really do any of these things anymore.

It's so... humbling to remember that God isn't the one who left.

I'm facing some crossroads in my life, trying to find a new direction for Annie and I to go in. (This new direction will hopefully include gainful employment for me. Also, I got fired back in October.)

But the biggest thing I've got to do, no doubt, is regain my focus.

I have allowed the detritus of the world to distract me from the Glory.

Sooooooooooooooooo...  Gotta stop doin' that, I guess...

Pray for me.

* - Well, OK, the only thing that isn't, you know, totally useless. Somebody find me a job as a never-ending source for entirely useless trivia, and I'll be set for life.

On the Theological Import of Cheese

My wife and I were in Whole Foods not too long ago. As we wandered through the store, Annie went looking for some olive juice shampoo and pine sap conditioner, but I wound up lingering by the cheese.

I didn't mean to lose her. It just happened. The cheese guy was behind the counter, and I wanted to sample... everything. The smoked chipotle Gruyere looked amazing, and then there was the honey-infused farmer's cheese, and then the cranberry Wensleydale, and the horseradish cheddar, and the double Gloucester, and goodness... the cheese.

I turned to offer Annie a sample of whatever glorious fromage had just graced my mouth and was surprised to find that she was not there.

So did she leave me? Or did I just get left behind because I was distracted?

How often do I get distracted from God by cheese? (Very.)

As you might have deduced by the state of this blog, my spiritual life has been somehwat dry as of late. Is that God's fault? Did He stop loving me? Did He stop blessing me with each and every step I take? Did He decide He no longer has a direct interest in my life?

Or did I just get distracted by the cheese?

Things get hard in life sometimes. Annie and I don't know where we're going to be living come next month. Shouldn't I still be focused on God?

I have fallen farther behind in my spiritual walk than I am really comfortable admitting to myself. But it's entirely because I got distracted by the cheese.

I got (get) so worked up about the things in the world that I can't even do anything about and it distracts me. I lose my focus on God and put it on frivolities.

I don't want to do that anymore. I had a thriving, brilliant relationship with God not so very long ago... and I've let the mundane fluff of the world pull me away from that. And my goodness, there's just so much of it.

Annie and I could use some prayers. This coming month will be hard for us. But the biggest thing I'd like to ask you to pray for is that I find my focus again. That I can remember where God is and stop being distracted. I've forgotten so many things that I held close and fast in my mind and heart. I just am not where I used to be, and it's because I got distracted.

So... there's that.

A short letter to some folks who ought to know better

Dear every Christian in every pointless argument with any other Christian about Christianity ever:

John 5:39-40.

Look it up.

Yeah. Lookin' at you there, chief.

While we're at it, Titus 3:9.

So knock it off, OK?

You're a Christian, that other person is a Christian, I'm a Christian, we're all Christians...

...so maybe we don't have to fight tooth and nail over translations of the Bible.

Or instruments.

Or the exact point in your acceptance of Jesus Christ at which you will be allowed into heaven if you die before (finishing the prayer/baptism/first communion/first time you mess up passing out communion).

I'm not saying that there aren't issues of doctrine that are worth correcting, because there are. You can't, for instance, sacrifice your children to Molech as a Christian. Yes, I know, it's an OT law, but still, it's not a good thing to do once you're trying to follow Jesus.

You know what is a good Jesus-following thing to do? Not being a nitpicky twerp. That is a very Jesus-like characteristic that it would really behoove a lot of us to develop.

Let's try to maybe focus on the big picture for a minute, OK?

Despite whatever differences of belief may exist between you and your brother from the congregation across the street, they're minute. I promise you, they are teeny tiny. Especially when compared with the differences  between your beliefs and the beliefs of everyone else in the overwhelmingly vast majority of the world who isn't a Christian at all.

If we can't even talk amongst ourselves civilly, how are we ever going to bring those lost in the world in to the Kingdom?

I have never understood how people can argue so much about what the Bible says while completely ignoring what the Bible means.

Forest for the trees, man.  Forest for the ding-danged ol' TREES.

Look, I just... I saw some things, I had concerns... I promise, I still Matthew 22:34-40 you, but you just gotta stop being such a Numbers 22:21-41.

Some things I'd like to see.

More of this:

Christians Protect Protesting Muslims from Pro-Mubarak Thugs

Less of this:

ABC News segment about the Christians protesting the new mosque in Murfreesboro.  Way to represent the home state faith in front of the national media, y'all.  Keep makin' us look terrible.

Also...

More of this:

Christian group says "I'm Sorry" at Gay Pride parade in Chicago

Less of this:

You know these people. I don't need to tell you any more.  If that picture doesn't make you mad, you're not paying attention.

I cannot help but think that our evangelistic efforts would be vastly served if Christians at large actually began to live anything like Jesus, the Christ of whom we are -ians, suggested.

Notice that tag at the bottom of that.  This is from an atheist site.

Gang, I've got some pretty bad news - THE ATHEISTS UNDERSTAND JESUS BETTER THAN OUR TEAM DOES, AND WE'RE THE ONES WHO THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY REAL.

Don't ever, ever, ever forget that the single reason people aren't in church is people who are in church.

Don't be the reason people avoid church. Don't be the reason people don't understand Jesus. Show Love. Show the Love that means that you'll willingly die for someone you will never know in this present reality.

Let's all try to Love other people despite their beliefs that we don't share, especially since we're accepted members of communities of people who care for us and love us because we only believe the same things they do.

Let's all try to Love other people despite their lifestyles of sin, especially since we've all managed to completely eliminate all sins of omission, sins of commission, ignorant sins, known sins, habitual sins, and I-swear-it-was-just-this-one-time-please-don't-arrest-me sins.

I have kinda forgotten how to do this writing thing.

Just a quick update, prayer requests, and food for thought...

Hi!  Been a while.  Sorry.

I have a journal (still blank) that I got for Christmas a few years back.  The cover of it reads something like, "Don't write because you want to say something; write because you have something to say."

I haven't really had anything to say since January.

I've got a lot of things to say now, but it's taking me a while to get it out.  Rest assured, it's coming.  (Like there are ANY of you left reading this!)

The last time I posted, things were rough.

Things are now WAY better.  Thank you for your prayers, love, and goodness.

Big big big big big big thing in my life right now: Annie and I are applying for a CARES Team Apartment Life ministry.  The way we see it, this would be the perfect launching pad for everything we already want to do in our marriage, and a natural extension of everything I have been doing since I moved to Texas.  I have made my life here about reaching out to those who have not been reached.  Some have not even been reached out to in the first place.  I wanna go get 'em.  And with God's help, I have and will continue to do so.

So pray for that, if you would please!

I do have a job now.  It is very boring.  If I were to write about it, it would bore you.  So just know that I have a job, and that it is good enough for now, because it is better than nothing at all.  It could be better.  But it isn't worse.  So that's great.

Amberland is coming up in a hair over a month.  That's kind of a big deal.  Wedding is also coming up.  Kind of a bigger deal.

I asked for help with this back before the New Year because I needed help, and I got help, so I'm asking again because I could use some help.  Amberland is all the way in Georgia, which is quite a stretch from Texas, and gasoline is hovering just under $4.00.  We could use some gas money.

Last year, Corwin and my sister came with me (along with a whole other mess of people) for their first time.  They'll be back with me this year, along with Annie for her first year.  This is my third.  I've served communion two years in a row now, and I plan to keep it going.  Last year, Corwin and Lyn helped me reach out to more people than I could on my own by speaking to them in Truth and showering them in Love.  Annie's along to help us do more.  She already met a chunk of people at the New Year's Eve run, and planted seeds along the way.

I performed a wedding last year.  I can't even begin to tell you the number of people who wanted to talk to "the preacher" after that.  And not just for the rest of that weekend, but even months afterward.  In October, I met a guy at a show in Austin who wasn't even at Amberland last year but had heard about the wedding and wanted to talk to "the preacher."  At the New Year's shows, there were dozens of people who remembered "the preacher."

The groundwork is done.  The foundation is laid.  The seeds are planted.  Things are starting to grow.

I want to be able to keep working.  If you can help me out with gas, please, hit up the PayPal donation thing.  To your right.  Yellow button.  Says "HELP A BROKE DUDE" right above it.

Corwin, Annie and I are all volunteering this year, so we get into the festival for free.  We can eat cheap.  All we need is the gas to get there.  If you can help, please, please, please do.  This is my field.  These are my people.  God has called me to go to them, and go to them I must.  I trust Him to provide.  I just want to make sure I offer you an opportunity to help Him out.

So also pray for Amberland, if you would!

And now I just want to ask a few questions, and I really hope you'll bless me with a response.

When has there been a time in your life that God drastically changed you for the better?  What happened?  Did it hurt?

Just so you know...

Things are hard right now.

I'm in bad need of a job.  I have been in need of a job since moving to Texas in April, and so far, every application's response has been a deafening roar of silence.

I did have a job, briefly, in August.  Over the course of 3 days, I made $52.00...

Problem is I had to spend $60 to make it.  So with 3 days worth of work, I made -$8.

Awesome.

God is good... but it kinda feels like not much else is right now.

I'm incredibly thankful for the blessings I have in my life, chief among them being my wonderful fiancee.  I'm so grateful to have found a woman who is willing to put up with me for the rest of my life.

I'm tired of being a burden.  I'd really like to be able to actually support myself... and, you know...  my future wife.

Things are hard.  I could really use some prayers.  And, if you got it, a hook up on a job that will actually hire me in the mid-cities D/FW area.

I really just don't have a lot to say right now.  I'm sure I'll be back writing soon.  Winter is always hard on me.  This one has proven to be no exception.

Something's gotta give, right?

Just hope it ain't me.

A Genuine Plea for Some Help

Hi.  I don't know if you've ever been here before, so allow me to make some preliminary introductions.

I'm Aaron Rushton, and I am a voice crying out in the wilderness, declaring the way of the Lord.

The particular wilderness I find myself in is the jam-band crowd.  If you don't know what a jam-band crowd is like, imagine everything you've ever heard about Woodstock distilled into one place.  It's kinda like that.

As you might have imagined, this isn't exactly the most church-going group of folks out there.

But they are still people, and they do still need Jesus, and they do definitely still need someone to talk to them about Him.

Over the past three years, God has made it plainly evident to me that I am called to be at least one person sharing the goodness of Christ with the people around me in the jam-band crowd, and specifically, in the Perpetual Groove crowd.

I've mentioned my work in the PGroove circles before.  I am already accepted as "the preacher" in that crowd.  I've served communion at Amberland, the band's three-day camping & music festival, for two years running.  I've seen a lot of love among these people.  They are definitely searching for the Truth.  I've been in hard spots before in trying to reach out to this crowd.  God delivered my help then, and I'm confident He'll do the same thing again now.

I'm specifically asking for help in regards to one thing: getting there.

This year, the Perpetual Groove New Year's Eve run is in Atlanta, Georgia, and I'm going with my fiancée and sister in tow.  We could use a little help in the way of gas money and other expenses for the two days we'll be down there.  It's not a lot, but it is more than I have.  I know Christmas is a hard time of year, financially, but I'm just asking for a little bit of help - little bits add up to a big lot.

You can go to my PayPal donation page and make your donation there, any amount helps.

I realize this may sound like I'm trying to solicit donations in the name of the Lord just so I can take my girlfriend and little sister to a couple of concerts, but I assure you, this is work.  This is my mission field.  This is where God has asked me to make His voice heard.  I can't go to concerts anymore without somebody asking me, "Hey, you're that preacher guy, right?"  And that's when my night always gets interesting.

It's because I go to Perpetual Groove shows that I know Mark and Lisa, who have been incredibly supportive to me as fellow lights in the darkness.

It's because I go to Perpetual Groove shows that I talked to Brad until 6:00 AM last year.

It's because I go to Perpetual Groove shows that I helped Jill redefine her understanding of what God has asked His church to be.

It's because I go to Perpetual Groove shows that I was asked by complete strangers to perform their wedding which gave me an opportunity to present the power of God's Love to a group of people who might not have ever heard it otherwise.

There is work to be done, and I am trying my best to do it.  I'd appreciate some help to get a little further down the road.  God bless you.