The Burden of Nerdin'

So I didn't get the job at Lone Star Comics.

In my interview, I told the woman interviewing me that I wanted to work at Lone Star because of all the comic book stores I've been to in the 17 states in which I have been to comic book stores, the Lone Star location on Cooper in Arlington is seriously in the top 5.  There are literally hundreds of candidates here, and Lone Star is EASILY in the top 5.

I would absolutely LOVE to work at Lone Star Comics.

And I honestly don't understand why I'm not already doing that.

Seeing Thor kicked me back into high gear on my comic reading.  I finally got volumes 2 and 3 (of five) from the Walt Simonson Thor run, allowing me to finish something I've had volume 1 of (as well as volumes 4 and 5) for nigh upon 6 years now.  Finishing Simonson's Thor, I immediately had to go for his Fantastic Four work.  I already had volumes 1 and 2, which I devoured...  and then needed volume 3!

So Corwin and I went to Lone Star.  The book I was hunting wasn't on the shelves, so I asked the guy at the computer to help me out, which he definitely did to his best ability.  The only snag was that it took 20 minutes and the help of another employee as well as the manager to find this book.

I am not complaining about this.  I can spend 20 minutes in a comic book store goofing around without ANY problem.  I'm just noting that it's not super efficient.  The manager even said so, pointing out that the book was listed in the computer with the title all wrong because there are employees who don't know what's important out of the title of the book so they don't know how to enter it into the computer.  The spine of the book I was hunting reads "Fantastic Four Visionaries by Walter Simonson, volume 3."  The manager said the book was listed on the computer as "Fantastic Vision Simon 3," hence the very understandable delay in finding the book.But hey, I still got to read about the Fantastic Four teaming up with Hulk, Spider-Man, Wolverine and Ghost Rider to fight Skrulls in the underground domain of the Mole Man and his legions of subterranean monsters, so that's pretty awesome.  Why would I care about how someone screwed up listing the book - I still got it, didn't I?

Well...  YEAH...  But I don't think I'm being too arrogant when I say that I could probably help things move at least a little smoother down there if I had that job just because I already do that kind of thing with my own comics.  I have a huge spreadsheet of all the comics I own.  I'll admit, it's a little out of date, but I do have the thing.

So, at the suggestion of Corwin, I went back to the Lone Star office, hoping to talk to the woman who interviewed me.  She was out, so I talked to...  some other guy.  And I hit my nerd-stride and ranted a little while.  Then I left.

I still don't have the job, but to be fair, it was just Friday when I did that, so...  who knows what'll happen.The other night, Corwin and I met a dude at the 7-Eleven and absolutely rocked his world with the information that the ticker on your odometer measures out pre-determined distances of 528 feet - also known as a tenth of a mile - and not blocks.

When we were done blowing his mind (a process which included Corwin and I taking a two-mile round trip drive just to check the odometer against our varied predictions of a predetermined distance), the guy said he was going to call his sister in Abilene to tell her the amazing news of tenths of a mile as a unit of measurement.

It was a pretty surreal conversation.

I also had a few surreal conversations with some amazing folks I met at a friend's housewarming party a few nights back.  Bein' the self that I am, it wasn't too long before I found myself embroiled in discussions of the nature of the universe and whatever powers do or do not exist behind it.

What most consistently amazed me, however, was that I was talking to people who had all in various ways and to various degrees rejected the particular permutation of Christianity that they were raised in, but when engaged in conversation with a dude who self-identifies as a preacher, they find no shortage of words to spill on their love for a thing they have rejected.

What I found the most fascinating about those conversations was that the more they talked about what they left church for, the more they would counter it with the things they loved church for.  The bad was always balanced with the good.  And the good was normally the right thing to be excited about!

I get in trouble when I play games like SceneIt! or Trivial Pursuit because I wind up being that guy at the party that takes one turn and goes all the way around the board and wins the game without letting anyone else play.  It isn't my fault that you go until you miss, and it's also not my fault that useless questions like the ones asked in both of those games happen to be the things that my brain absorbs the most readily, but dang it, that is the simple truth of the matter.I am an arrogant know-it-all, and I know it.  Hate it.  Trying to fix it.  Not making as much progress as I would like, but with God's help I'm at least less of a jerk today than I was 5 years ago.

So I still don't know what to do when I'm in situations where the knowledge and understanding in my head would solve a lot of the problems being presented and has not been asked for, or has even been rejected.

I know how to sort, file, tag, bag, enumerate, collate, grade and price comics.  If for nothing else than innate abilities and a fiery passion for the job, I think I should have gotten the job at Lone Star.  I think I could be helping them do their job better just because I am already pretty good at doing that job in my free time.I know what a tenth of a mile is.

I know what Jesus said about how we're supposed to live. I hate most of the same things that most people who say they hate church hate about the churches they hate, and I love the same things that those same people love.  The bad things should be tossed out because they don't work - the arrogance of those who believe that their church affiliation earns them an extra helping of God's Love, for instance, is utter rubbish.  The good things should be encouraged and nurtured that they may flourish - the humility of the realization that Love doesn't hold grudges but instead relentlessly forgives is a pretty awesome one that I'd like to see more churches grab on to.

I don't feel like I should get some sort of special attention for knowing this stuff.  It's not like there are a lot of uses for knowing that Walt Simonson's run came a few years after John Byrne's, which was itself a few years after George Pérez's run, which was, of course, after the Stan & Jack run.

But ONE of those VERY FEW USES for that information is WORKING AT A COMIC BOOK STORE.

So...  shouldn't I at least try to make sure that SOMEBODY in charge knows that I already know a lot of this stuff that other people - people with far, far better skin and hair - would normally have to look up?

I dunno.

I've definitely seen the impact that a small bit of information can have on somebody, even if it's something that I take as a commonly agreed-upon point!  Redefining the functionality of the odometer based on tenths of a mile instead of city blocks was apparently a huge deal for that guy at 7-Eleven.  I didn't even know that people didn't know that.

And I've definitely seen that people are hungry for something that God offers.  Even in their rejection of God and everything that aspires to follow Him, these people are themselves longing for a connection to God that is real and vibrant and alive and powerful...

But they have a hard time believing me when I tell them that it's really pretty close to their grasp.  They already know a lot of the big truths!  Don't be a judgmental ass!  Don't segregate people!  Don't use people!  Don't belittle people!  And especially don't do it in the name of the Love of God!  Those are the things that Jesus got the most upset about!

So why is there such a resistance to agreeing with Him?

When the picture of Jesus includes hatred, it's easy to reject!  But when the picture of Jesus is actually shown the way it's supposed to be, as a picture of pure, unconditional, holy Love, then it's hard to be upset with that.  It's hard to argue with it.  It's hard to do anything other than say, "Well, I guess that Jesus guy was right - maybe we SHOULD all be exactly as nice to each other as we want everybody else to be to us."

I don't claim that I have any sort of unique understanding or some new vision of truth.  I'm just the guy who knows a lot of stuff that other people don't for whatever reasons.  I will READILY admit that 99% of the stuff in my brain is wholly pointless.  Uncanny X-Men #1 came out on September 30, 1963.  Totally pointless.  But I know it.

But that slim 1% of stuff that I know that actually matters?  It matters a whole lot!  And people WANT to hear it!  But they're so hung up on rejecting anything that sounds like God or religion or anything else that they can't see the Truth even when they're pointing at it!

Look...  I know this is getting rambly, but whatever, I had a few Shiners out at the TANSTAAFL and sometimes a man just has to say a thing.  So here's my point: I know things.  Honestly, it's the only thing I do well - know stuff.  A lot of it has absolutely no use.  But what precious little does is of the utmost universal importance.  The gravity of its truth is inescapable.  Love is the right answer.

So...  why don't people just accept that?  Is it just because God said it?  Or even, heaven forbid, because I said it?

I know a lot of stuff, but I sure don't know about that.

Thoughts about stuff and things

I'd like to take a moment to talk to you about stuff and things.

First: stuff.  It's just stuff.

Second: things.  They're just things.

I know that stuff can be pretty awesome.  And I have definitely enjoyed the things that I have been blessed with in my life.  But what it took me far too long to learn is that when you get down to it, it's still just stuff and things.

I don't know if it's a problem that's exclusive to American Christianity, but it seems like we've allowed too much of the Joel Osteen prosperity gospel to creep into our lives.  I say "we" because I am definitely guilty of it, even in the mostly ascetic life I've found myself living here in Arlington.  We've got this idea that more stuff is better.  We fight tooth and nail to defend our things, as if they were what mattered.And don't hear me saying that stuff and things are bad.  They're not.  They're in fact very nice.

But they are still just stuff and things, after all.

Read through Acts, especially the early chapters, and see what the early church's attitude was towards stuff.

Christian #1: I need stuff.

Christian #2: Hey, brother!  Did I hear you say you need stuff?

Christian #1: Yeah, man.  I need stuff.

Christian #2: Well...  I have stuff...  How about you have some of my stuff?

Christian #1: Oh, wow!  Thanks, man!  Now I have the stuff I needed and life can keep on going.

Stuff is nice, but if you're not using it for the glory of God, what's the point?  If you're not using it to serve others, what's the point?

Take it from a dude who has spent a whole lot of his life focused entirely too much on stuff and things (and even things about the stuff and stuff about the things, as well as extra stuff that you have to get just to keep the things in pristine condition, and then the things you have to have for all of that stuff) - it's not worth it for its own sake.

I'll drop the silly pronoun usage to make a point: I have recently been re-re-reminded just how very much I love comics.  But what's been the most fun is sharing those comics with a few of the people around me.  It isn't enough that I have the comics, or that I have read them countless times, or that I know all the crazy stories behind the publication and origins and blah blah blah.  That doesn't matter compared to seeing the smile on someone else's face when they get it.  When they see why I love (whatever book it is) so much, that's when it's worth having the thing in the first place.

Now, obviously, comics are different from houses.  But...  they are both still just things, aren't they?

Doesn't the Bible say that the early church was selling EVERYTHING they had and taking care of each other?

Wasn't that the "one thing" Jesus told the rich young ruler he needed to do - sell everything he had and follow Jesus?

I really don't have a lot of stuff.  It's freeing, sure, but it's also a burden, because the simple reality of the world that we live in is that you have to have SOME stuff or otherwise you can't get ANY stuff.

But what little (very little) stuff I do have, I have tried to share freely with those around me.

And you know what?  Sometimes that's still really hard.  It's MY stuff, isn't it?  I deserve it, don't I?

Well...  No.

It's hard to walk away from the American ideal of working hard to get more stuff - especially when the alternative Christ offers is to work hard and give all your stuff away.  Jesus tells us not to store up treasures down here, but to store them up in Heaven.  The hard part is that I can't see my Heavenly treasures.  I can't hold them.  I can't see them represented as a number at the ATM.

And isn't that really the craziest part of Christianity anyway?  That we base it all on something that none of us have actually experienced in a material sense?  We've never seen God, but we follow Him anyway.

How far are we willing to follow Him?  If He asks us for an hour a week, we'll gladly give it to Him - we might even get dressed up for it.  But what if He asks me to give up my comics?  My DVDs?  My iPod?

(The iPod would be the worst.)

God is all that matters.  God is the only reality.  Everything else is questionable.  Temporary.  Pointless.

So why not live that way?

Why not sell everything we have and take care of those who need it?  Because it's uncomfortable?  Because it's hard?

When did we decide it was OK to take the easy way out?

I am a guy preaching against materialism when I don't have a lot of stuff to begin with...  except for debt.  Got a lot of that.  I hope that when the day comes (if ever) that God chooses to bless me with material wealth, I will be able to use it wisely and completely for His purposes.

In the meantime, I hope and pray that I have the wisdom to use what little I DO have for His purposes, and I hope and pray that you will do the same.  May God bless you with less stuff.