Seeing What I Want to See

I don't know about you, but 2010 was awesome for me.

Was every day of the year blue skies and rainbows? Oh, merciful goodness, no. By no means! There was heartache all over. There was impatient anger and indignant fury. There were lies and betrayals. There were lots of disappointments on some seriously fundamental levels. BAD STUFF HAPPENED this past year, make no mistake.

But 2010 is going to go down in my own personal history books as the year I finally let God take full control of my life, and that fact alone has made it by far my best non-1983 year to date.

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.

- Matthew 7:7-8

I will give thanks to You, LORD, with all my heart;

I will tell of all Your wonderful deeds.

I will be glad and rejoice in You;

I will sing the praises of Your name, O Most High.

Those who know Your name trust in You,

for You, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek You.

- Psalm 9:1-2, 10

I will extol the LORD at all times;

His praise will always be on my lips.

I will glory in the LORD;

let the afflicted hear and rejoice.

Glorify the LORD with me;

let us exalt His name together.

I sought the LORD, and He answered me;

He delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to Him are radiant;

their faces are never covered with shame.

This poor man called, and the LORD heard him;

He saved him out of all his troubles.

- Psalm 34:1-6

You, God, are my God,

earnestly I seek You;

I thirst for You,

my whole being longs for You,

in a dry and parched land

where there is no water.

I have seen You in the sanctuary

and beheld Your power and Your glory.

Because Your Love is better than life,

my lips will glorify You.

I will praise You as long as I live,

and in Your name I will lift up my hands.

I will be fully satisfied as with the richest of foods;

with singing lips my mouth will praise You.

- Psalm 63:1-5

But if you seek the LORD your God, you will find Him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul.

- Deuteronomy 4:29

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.

- Hebrews 11:6

I hope you picked up a theme in all of that. In case you didn't, let me sum it up:

IF YOU LOOK FOR GOD, YOU WILL FIND HIM.

Before I go any further, let me make something perfectly clear: I do not understand atheism.

Yeah, I know what atheism is. I get that.

And yeah, I can see how it came about. That's not a problem.

But what I specifically don't understand is this idea that it's up to God to show us He exists instead of being up to us to find Him - especially when God specifically says, "If you look for Me, you will find Me," as I've already pointed out.

Bertrand Russell - 20th century British philosopher, logician, mathematician, historian, prolific writer, and renowned atheist - was once asked what he would say to God if, after his death, he found himself standing at the Judgment. How would he explain his staunch atheism?

"I will say: ‘I’m terribly sorry, but you didn’t give us enough evidence.’"

Now... I don't know what would have qualified as "enough evidence" in Russell's mind. Paul makes an appeal in the beginning chapters of Romans that earth itself is enough to point to God, and a similar theme is brought up in the first six verses of Psalm 19.

And I don't have any problem admitting that I'm not entirely up to snuff on the textual criticism of the Bible. I do not personally possess the knowledge sufficient to defend the early dates or the traditionally ascribed authorship of the New Testament. If there are doubts about the historical legitimacy and authenticity of the text, there will be doubts about the veracity of the text. This is an entirely understandable objection.

But let me, in my objection to the atheistic requirement that God provide the evidence for His existence, provide some evidence on His behalf.

I looked for God.

I found Him.

(This happens to be exactly what God said would happen.)

Now, it makes all the sense in the world to me to think that this would be enough to turn even the most stubborn of atheists, but of course, that's not the case, so let me go a little further.

You know those little sausage balls that show up every once in a while at the good church get-togethers and Christmas parties and wedding receptions and all that? The unbelievably delicious little perfect mixture of sausage, cheese, and crispy breading? You wanna know how to make those? Get ready, because here it comes:

3 cups Bisquick

1 lb. sausage

1 lb. cheese

Mix all ingredients. Scoop out mixture into little sausage ball-sized sausage balls.

Bake at 350 degrees for about 15 minutes, or until sausage balls are a crispy golden brown, like sausage balls ought to be.

You have now made sausage balls. Congratulations, everybody loves you.

Now... if you try that recipe and green bean casserole comes out of your oven, one of two things will be true. Option number one is that I lied to you. Option number two is that you didn't follow the recipe. Which of those two do you believe to be more likely? Would I have any reason to lie to you about how to make sausage balls? Come on. Think about this. I am a fat dude, and there is always the possibility of you sharing with me, so I will do everything within my power to ensure the existence of sausage balls.

It seems to me that the atheist position of asking God to prove Himself (when God has said that if we look for Him we will find Him) is a lot like someone saying that the recipe for sausage balls can't possibly be true because the sausage balls don't make themselves. If you're not willing to follow the recipe, you can't ever know if the recipe is actually right.

The big objection to me tying the theory of the recipe for sausage balls to God is, of course, going to be that we all know sausage balls exist because we've all seen them, smelled them, eaten them, thrown violent temper tantrums when we ran out of them... (Well, maybe not ALL of us have done that.)

But God - whom even the Bible says no man has ever seen (John 1:18, I John 4:12) - cannot be proven in the same way as sausage balls, right?

Well...

God says, "If you look for Me, you will find Me." I looked for God and I found Him. Turns out God was right! Isn't that neat?

Now I know that argument would probably never hold up against a committed atheist, especially an atheist who already knows that there's not even a possibility of a God. The atheist rebuttal to my "finding" God would inevitably boil down to the idea of my living under a delusion, separate from reason, in defiance of evidence to the contrary... After all, if I'm seeing God at work in my life, then I'm only seeing what I want to see, so it can't be true.

This is another one that blows my mind.

Dad and I wanted to see True Grit. So we went to the theater and saw True Grit. We both really enjoyed it.

Did we see what we wanted to see? Yep. Sure did.

So does that mean that we didn't actually see True Grit?

I could go on, but I think you get the picture, so now I can move on to the point I really wanted to make.

I've been framing this whole thing since the wall-o'-scripture in a Christian-versus-atheist light because it allows me to use really broad strokes and get the BIG idea across. But now, I've got to do some detail work and talk Christian to Christian.

If you're a Christian, I know you already believe in God. I know you already believe in Jesus. I know you already trust the Bible to be accurate.

But what I don't know is if you're actually taking it seriously.

Let me stress the "I don't know" part of that last sentence. I'm not saying you're not taking it seriously. I'm just saying that I don't know. You're the only one who can.

Well... You and God.

Ask yourself... Do you actually believe Jesus when He says, in Matthew 6, that if you seek God first, everything else will fall into place?

Do you actually believe Him when He says, in Matthew 7, that if you seek Him, you will find Him?

Do you actually believe what the writer of Hebrews says, in the 11th chapter of the letter, that God rewards those who earnestly seek Him?

Now... If you actually believe these things, do you actually live it out?

Is God really your first priority? Does God win out over your job? Your hobbies? Your family? Your own life?

You're the only person who can answer those questions, and God's the only other one who'll know if you're telling the truth.

If God IS your first priority, I don't doubt at all that you're seeing a lot of the same things I've been blessed enough to see over the past year. I don't doubt that you're seeing the fruits of the Spirit borne in your life. I don't doubt that you're overcoming evil with good. I don't doubt that you're finding yourself stronger and stronger in the face of temptation. I don't doubt that you're finding more and more each day that God is the only thing in your life that really fulfills you. I definitely don't doubt that you're overflowing with joy and can't keep from telling people just how amazing God is.

But if He's NOT... Let me encourage you - as someone who very, very, very recently did not have God anywhere near the center of his life - to seriously consider making 2011 the year that changes your life. Look for God. You will find Him. And when you do... words fail me for expressing the way the Glory of God will manifest itself in your life in a very real, very powerful, very holy way. I wish I could tell you in a way that you could truly understand. I wish I could just GIVE it to you, because it would change everything for you.

I just really wish you could see what I see, because I'm seeing exactly what I wanted to see, and it's better than I could have ever imagined.

As 2010 comes to a close, my prayer for myself is that I will not just hold firm to the faith that has completely redefined my very existence, but that I will continue to go deeper in that faith, deeper into the very heart of God, led by His Spirit, following His Son, and encouraging everyone I come in contact with to do the same. My prayer for you is similar: I pray that each day brings you closer and closer to His Will for your life than you were the day before.

I love you so much.

Happy New Year.