Ruining My Own Good Name

I don't know how many of you play StarCraft - or even know what StarCraft is - but if you do, or if you play World of Warcraft, you can look me up on Battle.Net as AaronRushton. My character code is 187.

If you'd like to talk to me on AIM, my screen name is AaronRushton.

If you'd like to access my facebook profile, go to http://www.facebook.com/AaronJRushton.

If you go to the Perpetual Groove website and check their forum, you'll find me listed as AaronJRushton.

If you were to Google me (and please, don't), you'd find a whole lot of angry nerd rants from a few years ago on various comic book message boards under the username of AaronRushton.

And even in the rare cases that I'm not registered under my real name, for whatever reason, 99% of my involvement with the internet over the past 15 years has included a signature as Aaron J. Rushton.

One of the most amazing things about the internet is the ability to instantly connect to hundreds, even thousands, of people with whom you share interests.

And easily the worst thing about the internet is that there are a great deal many of those people who take the distance and anonymity afforded them by the internet as license to be complete jerks.

Let's say you have a picture of yourself and your niece and put it up on any one of the thousands of open photography hosting sites online. Now, it's not too far-fetched to think that your parents, your siblings, your grandparents, your cousins, your other nieces and nephews, etc... would get on and leave a comment saying, "Oh, this is a great picture of Nikki! Thanks for sharing it! Love, Uncle Buck."

But, unfortunately, it's not too impossible to imagine a scenario where those comments are followed up by things like "i hate ur face die in a fire" from some idiot who calls himself BIGPIMP420.

You see, most people are not quite as willing to display morally reprehensible behavior if their names are actually attached to it. Or, at least... I'm not.

So that's why my name - my real name - is plastered all over the internet.

There are some things I've said in the past that are, unfortunately, beyond my power to delete from the internet. But for the most part, I've managed to keep myself in check by the simple virtue of the fact that yeah, that's my name on that post. That's my name that people see on the monitor on the other side. That's my name ranting for four pages about how much I didn't like the 300 movie. So maybe I'd better keep it cleanish.

And maybe my motivations are wrong in this. Maybe I should be at a point where I just want to be good and clean and nice for the simple sake of being good and clean and nice. But as it is, I'm trying to be good and clean and nice just because I don't want people out there thinking that Aaron J. Rushton is a jerk.

(Well... not any more people than already do, that is...)

Not only do I have to worry about my own specific name's reputation - the "Aaron J." part - I've also got the "Rushton" tag at the end that's not exclusively my own. There are other Rushtons in this world who might not appreciate me stinkin' up the name for them.

In fact, I've met some other Rushtons who I'm very happy to not be related to (and will quickly deny any relation to), simply because their behavior and personalities did not reflect well on the name. I don't want to be any part of something that will leave a bad taste in people's mouths when they think of Rushtons, because hey - we're awesome.

So, to recap what I've got so far...

My behavior reflects on who I am, and once I've actually identified myself to the world as Aaron J. Rushton, it becomes even more important that my behavior is such that I will not besmirch myself through it. Anything that I do or say or write that is tied to my name is tied to what people think of me.

So when in the world are Christians the world over going to figure out that the same thing is true for us and how we reflect on the name of Christ?

Now you, if you call yourself a Jew; if you rely on the law and boast in God; if you know his will and approve of what is superior because you are instructed by the law; if you are convinced that you are a guide for the blind, a light for those who are in the dark, an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of little children, because you have in the law the embodiment of knowledge and truth— you, then, who teach others, do you not teach yourself? You who preach against stealing, do you steal? You who say that people should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who boast in the law, do you dishonor God by breaking the law? As it is written: “God’s name is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.”

Circumcision has value if you observe the law, but if you break the law, you have become as though you had not been circumcised. So then, if those who are not circumcised keep the law’s requirements, will they not be regarded as though they were circumcised? The one who is not circumcised physically and yet obeys the law will condemn you who, even though you have the written code and circumcision, are a lawbreaker.

A person is not a Jew who is one only outwardly, nor is circumcision merely outward and physical. No, a person is a Jew who is one inwardly; and circumcision is circumcision of the heart, by the Spirit, not by the written code. Such a person’s praise is not from other people, but from God.

Romans 2:17-29

See, the thing is... This really isn't about us. This whole Christianity thing... it's not about us. It's about God. It's all about God. Everything is about God. If you want to make your life work, if you want things to line up right, if you want it good... make your life about God.

And once you start down the path of trying to line your life up with God's will, trying to realign yourself to the purpose that you and I and everyone else were all created for, that's when things start to get better, and the whole point of it is to bring glory to God.

Your life is meant to show the world how awesome God is.

And every time we screw up, we show the world... well... something different.

I dispersed them among the nations, and they were scattered through the countries; I judged them according to their conduct and their actions. And wherever they went among the nations they profaned My holy name, for it was said of them, ‘These are the LORD’s people, and yet they had to leave His land.’ I had concern for My holy name, which the people of Israel profaned among the nations where they had gone.

“Therefore say to the Israelites, ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says: It is not for your sake, people of Israel, that I am going to do these things, but for the sake of My holy name, which you have profaned among the nations where you have gone. I will show the holiness of My great name, which has been profaned among the nations, the name you have profaned among them. Then the nations will know that I am the LORD, declares the Sovereign LORD, when I am proved holy through you before their eyes.

Ezekiel 36:19-23

If you're not up on your Biblical chronology, let me remind you that Ezekiel was one of the prophets of the Babylonian exile (thanks, Dr. Fortner!), and here we have God telling Israel that their upheaval and removal from Canaan was a result of their sin. Their sin, in turn, "blasphemed God's name among the Gentiles", as Paul put it back up in Romans 2. Israel's sin made God look bad, and as we clearly see throughout the Bible, making God look bad is not a good idea.

The LORD is my Shepherd;

I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:

He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul:

He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness

for His Name's sake.

Psalm 23:1-3

David says that God led him in righteousness for His Name's - God's Name's - sake, not David's sake. It is not to David's glory that he follows the righteousness of God. It is to his credit, and it definitely behooves him to do so, yes... but it's still all about God.

Good and upright is the LORD;

therefore He instructs sinners in His ways.

He guides the humble in what is right

and teaches them His way.

All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful

toward those who keep the demands of His covenant.

For the sake of Your Name, LORD,

forgive my iniquity, though it is great.

Psalm 25:8-11

Our sins reflect on us, sure. But what do they reflect? That we're messed up? That we're not perfect? That we're still human and still make mistakes?

Who cares about that? What difference does that make to anybody? How is that news?

But when our sins reflect on God... that's when there's a problem.

Think about people like Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church. If you don't recognize the name immediately, you'll probably recognize the fruits of their efforts. The Westboro Baptist Church is the group that has been going around protesting - among other things - the funerals of military men and women who died in Iraq or Afghanistan, preaching a message of hate, which they claim to be sanctioned by God.

I am not ashamed of the gospel... but sometimes I'm ashamed of other people who are calling themselves Christians.

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’

Matthew 7:21-23

There are some people out there who are making us look bad. Worse, they're making God look bad. They present a stumbling block to the truth with the way they warp and mistreat the gospel, their distortions of Christ's message of love and peace and goodwill to all mankind.

It is precisely because of people like Fred Phelps that the world has such a staunch opposition to Christianity - TRUE Christianity, as it is described in the Bible and led by the Spirit. It is explicitly because of the prejudices that fill our churches that people don't feel welcome. It is entirely because of the people who have completely missed the point of all this that the world at large misses the point, too.

I don't want to be a part of the problem. I know I have been at times. I know I occasionally still am. And believe me, it turns my stomach just to think of it. It kills me to think that I have, in any way, prevented anyone from knowing the awesome power of God in this world. I cannot bear the idea that I am possibly the one person whose actions have put such a smudge on the reputation of the church to the point that anyone - anyone at all - refuses to be any part of it.

I want to do it right. If I am to feel the sting of persecution, Lord, please let it be a result of my doing the right thing, not because I'm just messing it all up. God, please fill me with the strength to follow You in such a way that I bring glory to Your Name. Father, please help me live a life worthy of the name Christian.

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. For it is time for judgment to begin with God’s household; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God?

I Peter 4:12-17

Live up to the name. Please. Not for my sake, not for your own sake, and really, not even for the sake of the world outside who are looking in at us. Live up to it for the sake of God.